Just For Fun Entertainment

Sun Maid Raisin Girl Takes Own Life
By JUDITH KOSTER, Associated Press Writer

KINGSBURG, Calif. – The country was stunned today to learn the Sun Maid Raisin Girl is dead. “Yes, it’s true” stated a company spokesman. “Following a series of hateful anti-raisin sentiment across the country and the direct attacks against our marketing campaign, our beloved Sun Maid Girl has taken her own life. “She left a note saying she could no longer live in a world where raisins were unloved and unappreciated.”

Local residents of the sleepy town where Sun Maid Raisin has operated for more that 100 years were shocked and dismayed. “I love raisins, “sniffed Ms. Roberta Halft while she tried to hold back her tears, “and I just can’t understand why these horrible people are so hateful to raisins!”

Sales of raisins and raisin related products have suffered considerably during this period as well. Supermarkets across the country have been sending back unsold and expired raisins and raisin products for weeks. Many are refusing to stock these products as well. Sun Maid Corporate office is fighting back. “We will not allow the death of the Sun Maid Raisin Girl be a hollow death. We will bring raisins back to the kitchens of this great country of ours, stronger than before. We will not allow this subversive campaign to continue!” vowed a company press release.

Funeral services will be held at Brewster Memorial Chapel in Kingsburg Friday afternoon. A eulogy will be given by her closest friends, the California Raisins.

Associated Press Writer Eric Gorn contributed to this report.

My great friend has built an awesome Baseball Game and Simulator in Microsoft Excel and I think everyone should download it at this link: http://dynamogames.bravehost.com
and try it out! One of the coolest things about the simulation portion of the game is it accurately forecasted the 2007 League championship winners (Rockies and Red Sox) and the 2007 World Series winner (Red Sox.)

Here is a quick game overview:

- MLM is incredibly simple and intuitive. When batting, the player selects one of four batter options. When in the field, the player selects one of five pitch selections. That’s the only inputs other than preferences or player substitutions.

- The player does NOT control the pitch, the swing of the bat, etc. via a joystick or other mechanism. Outcomes are based on actual player statistics and random numbers. A player that has never played the game can compete with an experienced player immediately.

- MLM can be played player vs. player, player vs. computer, or computer vs. computer. Players have a wide option of preferences.

Here are some screenshots:

 

Main Display Screen:

Players Roster:

Here is extract #3 from the April 1990 of the BBS Humor Digest. This post contains content of an adult nature. Think of an ‘R’ rating in the movies.

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This guy wanted to get a tattoo, but in a place that wasn’t usually

visible to everyone, so he decided to get it put on his penis.

This guy had a girlfriend named Wendy, and that’s what he wanted the

tattoo to say. So off he went to the tattoo place.

When he arrived at the tattoo parlor, he told the tattooist where he

wanted the tattoo, and what he wanted it to say. Of course the tattoo had

to be put on while this guys penis was erect, so it would spell out

‘Wendy’ when it was erect.

A few days later the guy was in a restaurant bathroom taking a piss,

and saw that the guy in the next stall also had a tattoo on his penis, and

he saw that the tattoo started with the letters ‘W’ and ended with the

letter ‘Y’.

He said “HEY! You must have a girl friend named Wendy too huh?” (as

he showed his tattoo to the guy)

The other guy replied “Heck NO! Mine says ‘Welcome to Jamaica…

and have a nice day’”

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